Internet Suffers Elon Musk Withdrawal, Questions Meaning of Life

Elon Musk has been off Twitter for days. The internet is panicking. Some humanoids — facing a mental-emotional vacuum — are even now pondering the meaning of life.

Once upon a time, Elon Musk didn’t tweet all that much. I remember an article of mine — about why solar energy will dominate the energy sector — staying on the top of his Twitter account for something like 3 weeks.

At some point, though, the world wooed him to live in Twitterland almost without respite. Okay, that’s going a bit far, but something lured him to more and more frequently share his thoughts, company news, and tantalizing teases with thousands of obsessive Twitter followers.

(Technically, he has millions of followers, but sources say the obsessive ones are in the thousands. Also, Twitter is made to be fleeting. A while back, Elon’s tweets used to drive maybe ~7,000 clicks. Nowadays, they seem to drive tens of thousands every time. For sure, though, the vast majority of the 17.4 million “people” who follow him don’t see any given tweet.)

With the amount of tweeting Elon does, and the types of things he lets fly, there are bloggers across the world dedicated to following him obsessively and trying to be the first to cover any news he tweets at any given moment.

But what happens when Elon doesn’t tweet?

What happens when Elon takes a few days or — gasp — a week off?

Well, the internet ends. It stops. It freezes. Literally.

Furthermore, humans across the world go into withdrawal. “What’s happening?!?!?! Where’s he been??? What’s he doing???” Ah, this is the life he leaves countless homo sapiens.

Perhaps, if you are lucky, Elon’s Twitter absence even gets you to question the meaning of life.

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